Day 48 – Positivity

So I’ve been reading a lot of your blogs and reflecting on the funk I’ve got myself in. Reading about reframing and resilience, looking for the positives when feeling blue. I’ve also brought the book the happiness project to help crawl out of this mole hole I’m in.

Yesterday I felt awful in my own skin and I let myself feel it. I think it was good to feel it as normally I’d blot it all out with a glass of wine and an espresso martini or 2. However today, I’ve woke up determined to search for the positives.

So todays positives so far are:

•I’ve woke up in a soft, clean bed with my husband who I adore and my baby singing in their cot.
•I’ve had cups of tea made for me and breakfast.
•I’ve finally fitted into a lovely linen jumpsuit I brought from fat face in the sale in May. At times I thought my boobs would never make it.
•BB is full of cold caught from my husband (we had covid tests and were negative) but is still their sunny self.
•We’ve drove to our little local town centre and eaten toast (BBs favourite food) together sitting outside a little cafe people watching.
•We’ve had money in our pockets and brought ourselves a book each.
•We then walked round the park, wrapped up and snuggly from the surprisingly Autumnal weather, showing BB ducks, geese and trees.
•Whilst walking my hubster (who really does deserve a medal) complimented me on my outfit and said I looked really stylish (probably a shock not seeing me in mum jeans and a Marks and Spencer tshirt).

I’ve read somewhere in the last week, that the problem with happiness is we constantly wait for it instead of being happy in the moment (thank you to whoever wrote it as it really resonated).

For example, I always think if I get to my goal weight I’d be happy, my life would magically be ideal. Or if I get to the next level of my career, I’d have “made it” (HR not being a stay at home mum, although I do feel like an MD most days).

I think the danger of this is never really slowing down and appreciating what you have. 5/6 years ago I longed to be in a partnership, where I felt loved and cherished and could love and cherish someone in return. I used to look at new mums or newly married and be sick with envy, often staying in on friday nights drinking alone. On reflection I was lonely, very lonely and lost.

If 6 years ago me, saw me now, I’d be envious of that person. That thought hits me like a ton of bricks.

Thinking about it 60 days ago, I’d be envious of the person I am now, off drink, getting a good nights sleep, mostly bright eyed and bushy tailed and taking up swimming twice a week.

So my though of today is to be happy in the moment, be grateful for what I have and hold my loved ones a little bit tighter. I don’t know what the future holds, but I dont want to look back 10/20 years from now and wistfully think of them as happy moments, if I didnt appreciate them. If I was so caught up in chasing the next goal or idea I missed BB grow up and the first few years of being married.

So today IS a good day and I WILL see the positives.

What’s your positives today?

Love

JS X

Published by lifesippingaway

36 years old, wife, stay at home mum, outdoors lover, wild swimmer, starting the journey to an AF life

14 thoughts on “Day 48 – Positivity

  1. Yes!!!
    When I look at all the people who are really struggling without any food, or rent, or other basic needs, I can’t help but be grateful.
    I wrote a new Mantra for myself, I printed out and say each morning and all day,
    “I’m thankful for all I have,
    “I’m thankful for all the people I love.”

    xo
    Wendy

    Like

  2. What a great post. I agree that some days you have to allow yourself to wallow and be in the mire with no pressure but then it’s time to get up and really try. Just a small thing sometimes. Gratitude is such a positive to have. It sounds like you had a pretty perfect day to me. Alcohol could not have made that any more perfect. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I didn’t get out for the croissant sadly. I spent the day in bed very very low. It was time to pull up my big girl pants and get back on the medication. Admit defeat and start over. It was a bad day but today I am up. Shaky but functioning. So on it goes … xx

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      2. Amazing that you’re up after feeling so low. And let’s reframe this, it’s not admitting defeat. It’s being strong enough and self aware enough to get help when needed. It’s about putting your big girl pants on (love this phrase), being a mum and being brave enough to try and hold it together for everyone. You should be very proud. You’ve got this xxxxx

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Ah thanks. That’s really made me feel good actually. I owe it to myself and to my boys to do what I can to feel better again. Hope you are having an easier time of it. You are doing so well. Xxx

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      4. You know that’s one of the greatest compliments I could have thank you ♡♡
        And you are too. When I read Claire Pooleys book, she says in it something like look at 5 year old you. How would you treat her? And I think you’re doing exactly the right thing. You’ve tried it alone, you’re getting into some choppy waters and now you’re treating yourself with dignity and respect by getting a bit of extra help xxx

        Liked by 2 people

  3. You sound like you are living your best life! It is easy in our privileged societies where we are constantly being sold the ideas of “more” and “better”, to lose sight of what we have. This is one reason I read the news and also very many depressing non fiction books about other parts of the world – it helps me keep perspective. I am grateful for so many things today, top being that I got lots of sober sleep, it is lovely weather, and I get to picnic outside with my family, mom, and sister this evening.

    Liked by 1 person

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