Day 73 – Gratitude (x2)

Dexter is setting in well. Day 2 and he’s already slept on the bed. BB adores him, but we are keeping an even closer eye on her when he’s around as we are desperate for him to feel safe.

He just happens to be the most loving cat I’ve had the pleasure in coming across. He’s so affectionate now he’s warming up to us and I’m loving the head bumps off him. He’s also the stinkiest cat I’ve come across too, never known a cat to pass wind like him. But I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it’s a change in food (which he’s eating plenty of).

I feel so lucky to have a lovely little family and that I didnt ruin it with drink. That I realised that I was in the grey area. I feel like all these tiny (and some big decisions) have led me to where I am now, cat in lap and BB snoozing. And I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for that decision I made sitting in a sunny country garden 73 days ago. Dexter wouldn’t be part of our lives. Our house would’ve been more chaotic, it would’ve been more stressful, I’d be in a cycle of drinking and then feeling rubbish.

I feel so thankful and grateful. I tell my friends how much better my life is sober and they look at me like I’ve been brainwashed. I think people don’t truly get it until you’re on the other side. Everyone keeps asking me when I’m going to drink again and I make a fly away comment like “oh some time” or “I may try another 100 days”. In reality I’m already planning a sober birthday and Christmas and I’m excited about it.

Have you found the same?

Love

JS x

Published by lifesippingaway

36 years old, wife, stay at home mum, outdoors lover, wild swimmer, starting the journey to an AF life

17 thoughts on “Day 73 – Gratitude (x2)

  1. You make it sound so easy!! Happy to hear the mental tug of war about drinking seems to have stopped in your brain. It hasn’t for me, I’m happy we are doing this, but last night had a definite moment of “one week of detox is enough, what harm is a couple beers?!”.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You saying that is so, SO helpful. I’m fine, but there is a point near the end of some days, when I am just done doing ALLLL the things and listening to ALLLL the kid talk, that the familiar voice says “fuck it, this is stupid, have a drink”. It is only my curiosity if it really does get better, fueled by all your stories that keeps me going.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ahh thanks, I was exactly the same. I had to read a ton of blogs and books just to get me through the day. I think boredom is a big trigger too, not helped with lock down and anxiety that goes with todays world x

        Like

  2. I did find the same. After 100 days I just said I was going to carry on. When people ask me if it’s forever I just say ‘dunno, haven’t decided’. I don’t feel the need to stipulate anymore. It’s not always easy but reflecting on the positive changes and being grateful really helps the process. Well done. The cat and your baby look so cute! Xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think that’s a really good way of looking at it. Forever seems too final, but I’m not in any way looking at starting again any time soon. And thanks, he’s so stinky, it appears he doesn’t groom himself just yet. But I’m sure in time he’ll get there. Hows you?hows your son xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I never say forever. It doesn’t work for me. I know my next target is 1 year and that’s all I need to know right now. He is doing ok. Has a cold so is a bit miserable today. Xxx

        Like

      2. There isn’t anything really tempting me to not be sober. I have moments of ‘I could do with a drink’ or ‘it would be nice to have a glass of wine’ but then I have a cuppa or an AF drink and the moment passes. I don’t ever want live the life I was living and to drag myself through so many days, finding it such hard work. That never happens now. Xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Amen
    Even after 6 years people are surprised when I say I don’t miss the booze…that I love my clear mind and calm nerves.
    It’s ok. They don’t need to understand. Only I do.

    What a pretty cat and a cute baby!!!

    Anne

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: