Day 98- Fricking Xmas cake

I decided to be all Mary Berry (instead of a merry berry) this year and have a go at baking a Xmas cake. I’ve never baked one before, but after watching mum as a child bake one I’ve always thought how hard could it be?

For someone quite disorganised, its ridiculously hard. Firstly, my husband came back from the shop with only half the cherries and no raisins. So we went back the next day and brought them.

I then realised I’d chucked the brandy out so after a quick google decided I would soak the fruit in darjeeling tea. Back to the shop for darjeeling tea.

We didnt realise that we’d brought loose leaf, so had to borrow a tea strainer from next door. Finally the fruits were in soak overnight (the recipe states 3 days but I didnt have time).

During this faff, I baked some premixed cupcakes with my step daughter and delivered them with candles and cheer to both my sisters for their birthdays.

So we’ve soaked the fruit. Now its time to make the cake. I look for the grease proof paper, we have none. The hubster had used the last of it in the week, so back to my mums to borrow some grease proof paper (couldn’t stand the thought of queuing at a shop again).

We stick all the dry ingredients together and we have no all spice. By this point I’m so unbelievably cross at myself I could have thrown the frigging soaked fruits up the wall. Instead I’ve improvised with chinese 5 spice (at this point the husband is hysterically laughing at me). He stops laughing when we both realise he’s used up all the brown sugar on something else. In goes caster sugar instead.

It goes in the oven and I automatically set it to 200. As everything cooks at 180 to 200 right? NOT THIS CAKE. After an hour I smell the corners burning and turn it down to 100 and hope the cake survives.

We are half way through the 4 hour bake. My step daughter is so excited that we’ve improvised or in her words done a really cool experiment. I’m close to tears in the corner.

So what have I learnt? Apart from I should stick to eating cake, not baking cake.

Well, planning is obviously important, reading ingredients and the method (hello baking paper). Seeing the excitement on my SD face, I keep telling myself, it’s the experience not the end product that’s important. And messing up and learning is half the fun of baking.

What’s also positive is I’m trying to see the good in this experience instead of focusing on the negatives (a million shop trips and a burnt, funny tasting cake). It’s bonded my SD and I, we’ve chatted away whilst doing it. I get to look forward to icing the bloody thing and force feeding a slice to my husband.

In the mean time, I think I’ll pause my application to the GBBO.

Oh and the best bit. I don’t even like frigging Xmas cake.

Happy sober sunday. How’s everyone elses going?



Published by lifesippingaway

36 years old, wife, stay at home mum, outdoors lover, wild swimmer, starting the journey to an AF life

20 thoughts on “Day 98- Fricking Xmas cake

  1. Ha ha sounds like my attempt (or rather at moment non-attempt as all ingredients reside in the cupboard) to make chocolate chip cookies with the son. He has eaten half the bag of chips. I forgot baking powder and soda the first time that I shopped. Now to bake. I do have parchment paper (grease proof paper) so now all I need to do is actually make the damn things.
    And with regards to the oven…..mine is out anywhere from 10-15 degrees so it is a guessing game as to when everything will be done and if it will be done completely at the same time.
    Have a fabulous sober Sunday. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Lol
    I am so with you. I am an engineer and I know the answer is to read the directions and plan ahead, but I’m a throw things in kind of cook. Baking never works out.
    I don’t like Christmas cake either.
    I hope you had a good laugh. I can’t quite imagine how Chinese 5 spice will work….but perhaps with the tea you will have created an Easter Christmas cake.

    I usually just buy baking. Other people are much better at that than me!

    Do we get a picture? Lol


    Liked by 1 person

    1. Im still giggling now, after I calmed down. Well it’s just been wrapped, but I’ve got a picture of the sodding burnt bits cut off πŸ˜‚πŸ€¦β€β™€οΈ . They actually taste really nice. I’ll take a picture on decoration day πŸ˜‚… happy to post a slice πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰


  3. This made me laugh so much. I just loved it. I hate Christmas cake too and I’m very impressed you even attempted it. I love that your SD was sooooo excited though and you smashed it whatever the outcome. Can’t wait to see the final thing in a photo! DdI you have any of the ingredients before you started? πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Loved this! I bought some mixed fruit to make my first Christmas cake too. Haven’t started yet. Now I’m hesitating! LOL
    All I can say there was plenty of love in the mixture. A+ for effort. And you don’t even like Christmas cake! LOL.
    Ummmm……Where’s the icing?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well…. apparently you have to feed the thing until a week before you want to eat it. Then you ice it. It’s a lot of commitment that’s for sure. If you do take the plunge I definitely suggest all spice πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€¦β€β™€οΈ

      Liked by 1 person

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