Yesterday after posting I had a scare.
I think every mum, dad, care giver dreads the day their children get ill. Most the time it’s a sniffle, a virus or a tummy bug. But a few parents are truly unlucky and their child gets really sick. Fast.
It must be gut wrenching.
Yesterday, after being poorly over the weekend, BB’s little rash turned ugly. It looked like bruises were covering her whole torso. When I put her in the bath to try and placate her (it’s one of her favourite places), I noticed her arms had turned a purple mottled colour.
My heart lept into my mouth. I was convinced it was meningitis or something else horribly serious. Quickly I pulled her out of the bath, dried her and drove her up to the hospital.
The hospital were absolutely brilliant. They saw us as soon as we arrived. I was crying and as soon as I said about her arms we were off into another room.
They checked her over and did some tests. They said it’s a nasty viral infection and that she could go home. Obviously she gave the nurse her first smile of the day. The nurses were absolutely fantastic and said they’d rather I brought her up 10x and it be this then not bring her and it be really serious.
We drove home, she had her favourite custard for dinner and then lots of cuddles. The relief I felt was indescribable. I covered her in kisses, blew raspberries and munched her little feet.
That evening I said to my hubby it’s the closest I felt to wanting a drink. I had such an urge, sitting there, BB in bed. It felt all consuming.
Confessing it to my hubster helped. He reminded me why. Its obviously still wired in as a coping mechanism deep down. I went and did my yoga but then urge still lingered.
Today she’s woken up, she’s chatting more and happier. Her rash is still there but my urge to drink has gone.
So I’ve managed to get to day 121 and I’ve done yoga every day of November and still not binged. I dont recognise myself any more but I’m liking this new person.
How is everyone?