Day 2 of replenish and it’s going well. I’ve done yoga last night and in BBs nap time today. I’m following a skincare routine and hiding from my husband the new products that are turning up with alarming frequency from the postman.
I’m drinking water. I’m eating mindfully my 2 snacks and 3 meals. I’m currently not doing portion control, but noticing already that when I allow myself to eat without restriction at meal times it sort of rights itself out.
I really enjoyed yoga last night, it felt returning to an old friends embrace, today however wasn’t as easy and I fidgeted through a practice. I’m still proud of myself for showing up.
I’ve started to follow sober accounts on instagram and felt quite overwhelmed on how clicky it appears and if I’m honest a little bit fake. It appears all sparkles and rainbows when in fact we all know it’s quite a struggle at times.
2 people happened to be in the sober community that I sort of know, using the word know very loosely. Someone I went to school with but wasn’t in any classes and in the opposite side of the year and another who I used to see out and about the local area.
Both people I’ve reached out to and congratulated them on their sobriety. I’ve shared I’m recently sober and it would be lovely to have a local sober connection. It took a lot of guts since I’m quite private (in real life) and some of my friends aren’t even aware that I’ve quit (thank you lockdown).
One of them said thanks but that was it and I felt a bit silly for messaging in the first place. The other completely ignored me then posted a few days later how they were always here for people in the sober community. That followers should reach out and send them a message if they were starting their journey or struggling. The insincerity of this statement really annoyed me.
Both these people have now become friends on instagram and seem to hang out in real life as much as the restrictions allow. They post over other sober accounts I follow and there seems to be a big click.
For some reason I feel like the kid at school, desperate to be picked but lurking on the sidelines not fitting in. And it sucks.
I’m now thinking of creating a private sober account on Instagram for anyone who does want to reach out. In case there’s another me out there that feels a bit rejected and maybe link it to this account. I dont think I’d be gushing over others sober accounts it will be a more quiet affair.
But also not sure if there’s not much point? Like I’d be so embarrassed if my husband or husbands ex wife ever found this blog or old friends/colleagues.
So those are my thoughts today.
Hope you’re all staying happy and healthy