I’m suffering from big, fat, mouth watering cravings tonight.
I know what’s causing it. I’ve had a rubbish week, banging head ache for 2 days, rushed yoga practice, little time to myself and my step daughter really grating.
This evening, I ran (read waddled) with my lovely mummy friend. We went around a local village where she lives. The air was fresh, it had that spring feel to it. The sun seemed to be setting on one side and the full moon on the other. Lots of people were out walking too.
The route took us through the centre of the village with lots of little bars, cafes and a pub (all shut).
There was something about the vibe, the lighter, warmer night that made me reminisce about other spring nights. Wandering to the pub pre children, celebrating the end of a working week, relaxing, having a few too many drinks and wandering back with beer coats on.
The strongest craving since sober time began hit me. We finished at my friends house and I drove home.
I could feel the feeling in my mouth, the twisty gut, the pure focus. All I want is fizz. A nice clean crisp glass of fizz.
I got home. Discussed with the husband. He’s been lovely and supportive as usual.
I had a big mouthful of nutella and now we’ve ordered pizza.
I think the trigger came from one the spring nights and two the fact I was starving, I hadnt eaten since noon and it was now 7pm.
I feel ok about ordering pizza. It’s the lesser of 2 evils. One pizza isn’t going to start a massive binge. It isn’t going to open a bottle and lead me down the rabbit hole.
So that’s where I am today.
Hope everyone else is having a lovely Friday
Lots of Love