Day 33 – love, life, loss

Yesterday ended up being the biggest test so far in sobriety and in all honesty I would’ve broke if it wasnt for my husband. I got the all clear from the boob clinic which was fantastic and I feel very lucky. I came home and was playing with BB just after her afternoon nap. WeContinue reading “Day 33 – love, life, loss”

Day 32 – The lump

I’m reading the Sober diaries I’ve just got to the bit where the author discovers she has breast cancer. This has struck a cord due to the fact I’m currently sitting in a waiting room at a hospital writing this post waiting for my own lump to be checked out. It’s feels sort of spookyContinue reading “Day 32 – The lump”

Day 26 – And repeat

This weekend the hubster and the step daughter are away camping. Being alone in the house on a friday would normally mean a bottle of wine for me with some netflixs. I used to actively look forward to these evenings. I feel stronger this Friday night than the cry for help 3 weeks ago. MyContinue reading “Day 26 – And repeat”

Day 25 – Rings and things

“Do you want a gin and tonic”, “no thanks”. “Come on have a glass of fizz”, “no thanks I’m going 100 days sober”. After explaining it a million times to my family, what is it they don’t get? My mum moved into her new home today and my sisters, my step daughter and I wentContinue reading “Day 25 – Rings and things”

Day 24 – The Hole

We stumbled over a hole today. Me and BB. When I mean stumble, I mean smash our knees (mine), whack our head (BB’s- they were in the baby carrier) and rip our toe nail off (mine).And we both cried. And cried. And cried. We cried when we got back to my mums, as we wereContinue reading “Day 24 – The Hole”

Day 23 – Play dates

Today BB and I had a play date with their little pal Alfie and his lovely mum. I’ve really struggled with bonding with other mums, especially due to Covid. I always feel not good enough as a mother, but I think this has a lot to do with my guilt around drinking and lack ofContinue reading “Day 23 – Play dates”

Day 21 -Banana pancakes and Canadian friends

I’ve made it to 21 days. I can’t believe it. I ran at 5:30am after waking with BB. I came across some geese crossing the road and they made me smile. I made banana pancakes for breakfast for the 3 of us. I met up with my wonderful Canadian friend and had brunch. I metContinue reading “Day 21 -Banana pancakes and Canadian friends”

Day 20 – The cot

Today is/has tested me. After going to bed at ridiculous early o’clock last night, I bounded out of bed like the Duracell bunny around 5:45am. I was determined to make the hubster breakfast. However, on investigating the contents of our fridge I realised we had no food nor coffee due to coming back yesterday fromContinue reading “Day 20 – The cot”

Day 16 – Gratitude

Today I’m so grateful for water. The vast lakes of the lake district that cleanse your soul. The babbling brooks that make my beautiful baby laugh with delight. The rain splashing my face that makes me feel alive. The water that hydrates my body and is the liquid fuel for every step. Today we didContinue reading “Day 16 – Gratitude”

Day 14 – Boob clap and brunch

The lavender really knocked me out yesterday and we had a rather wild Saturday night going to bed at 8:30pm. Lucky for me that we did, as Beautiful Baby (bb) woke me up at 3:30am demanding attention. Normally I’d have woken up fairly groggy to deal with them or kicked hubster out of bed toContinue reading “Day 14 – Boob clap and brunch”